Archive for October, 2014

::: A Lil’ Sompin’ Sompin’ :::

Friday, October 31st, 2014

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These last 21 months, I have experienced incredibly sweet and sometimes exquisitely excruciating growing pains as an artist with an entirely new kind of creation: a BABY. Yes, a real life baby! Biggest art project yet. Best times ever. Best challenges. Best lessons. Best rewards. Best tears. Best smiles. Best everything… Holy wOw!

It is hard to entirely imagine what this world of parenting is like until you are actually IN it. It is as equally hard to describe. It’s full on. It’s full on spiritual, full of paradoxes and the ineffable.

And to think I was busy before having a kid. Ha!

So how do you mom it AND art it up?

Life is a journey, with many twists and turns, many choices made along the way that make MY journey different from YOURS. En route, I have made the effort to share my experiences as an artist as genuinely as possible… my hopes, my fears, my successes, my failures. Now that I am a mom, I am looking at all this with an even deeper view, one filled with the ups and downs of being a new parent. The underlying foundation seems to be the same, but with greater responsibility and considerations in mind. What it still always boils down to?

The Art of Perseverance.

Art is my life.
I make it.
I share it.

And, what have I learned with this latest mural project?
How to keep painting and stay disciplined and “do my thang” WITH kid.

Painting is a very focused, one-pointed meditation. That means I do not paint when Aiza is awake. For this project, I painted about 3 hours every other night for 3 months, AFTER I put Aiza to bed at around 9pm. There were so many nights when I just wanted to PLOP and ploop out after a looooong day of baby snail trail clean up, but I grabbed my brushes anyway.

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How do I keep at it?
Like a dear friend once told me, “You got to WANT it.”

I mean reeeeeeeally WANT IT! To paint is to love. My unfolding body of work is my lifelong lover. How do you keep the fires burning? How do you keep things fresh and joyful? How do you get through the shit storms? These are the same questions I ask with greater fervency every time I feel like maaaaaybe today I won’t paint. Like, what? Like, maybe today you won’t kiss the love of your life, even if they piss you off sometimes? I don’t think so!

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And sometimes, you just can’t find your groove for 3 goddamn hours straight, and it just feels like wrestling. The point is that you show up anyway, and that includes taking small timeouts. It takes a LOT of focus and discipline to do what you love and not to mention– be your own boss! 🙂 Eventually, after doing something for so long with some kind of schedule, things do become routine. Choosing regular paint time becomes habit. And hopefully you don’t fall off it. And well, if you do, you just gotta get back on it. No shame, and no excuses.

We humans tend to glamorize something we think is cool, like making art, or music, or *fill in the blank*. Just because it’s “creative” doesn’t mean that it’s all FUN. Sometimes it’s really challenging! Sometimes being in love has its crappy moments, but if you’re committed, if you’re willing to work on things, the reward is infinite.

Happy creating!

 

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